Saturday, November 15, 2008

Old friends....

Ive been a member of Friends Reunited website for 5 years or so now and have caught up with the odd person. School for me as I have mentioned before was one huge stress, and other than the few goods friends I made, I didn't get anything out of it. With the exception of even lower self esteem and being so self conscious I only ever felt comfortable going out in the dark LOL. Its funny how you see yourself in that sort of situation, and it never enters your head what people actually think about you.
I was always under the impression that people hated me, though I was a freak and would rather be anywhere other than spending time with me. Popular was something that I would have loved to have been, but it was obvious that it was never going to happen, as I was so far down the food chain, eating my way through the opposition was not an option :)
When I wasn't avoiding the bullies i was desperately trying to fit in and failing badly :( Despite all that I did manage by some small miracle to gain an Though I have no idea how, and left school having passed ever subject I took.
I guess the point to this ramble is this...
Just recently a large group of us have managed to link up on Facebook. It makes me laugh as other than the odd message, I don't think people communicated on Friends much and suddenly with the move over to facebook every ones nattering away like they only left school yesterday :) Getting chatting to people has mad me realise that my understanding of my peers and what they thought of me back then was just totally wrong. OK I have no doubt they all thought I was a little odd lol, but I was!!, but the main thing that has come back is just how quite I was, and reluctant to mix and get involved. People just didn't know what to say to me so avoided
So I guess this goes back to stuff in my previous post. Not to judge a book by its cover and always to give the benefit of the doubt. Had I had the skills to do that back then, my experience of school would have probably been very different :P

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